Sometimes people are trying to find a big story line about the true causes of the emotions. The simple cause of feeding negative emotions is that we don't understand the true law of cause and effect. If we attach to negative emotions, such as worry and fear, we're going to suffer. Often people want to dig into these emotions and find the story line causes and grab them and go into them, and go into them and they just don't want to let them go. They're just too attached to them.
We have to be careful about the investigation aspect of the practice, because I've seen a tendency in some people of just wanting to grab every emotion and investigate in this way and that way and hang onto it. And they're afraid of letting it go, because they're very attached to it. Even times when people actually know the true cause and they've seen the patterns in their life, they still want to find some other causes. It's like, "Give it to me again so I can beat it up again, and extract every story line cause about it."
I've been using an analogy lately about a dog chewing on a bone. Even though the bone hasn't got any more juice left in it, he keeps on chewing and chewing and hoping for more juice out of it. He puts it down for a little while and digs it up again and goes chewing on it again even though it's dirty and really dry now. He just won't leave it.
This is similar with many people, because they're just attached to something like worry. Sometimes there's fear there. We may have done something unskillful, and want to know how we're not going to do it again. But it's a matter of learning how to practice in each moment, to learn how to not do it again. We have to look and see actually whether we are investigating really to find the cause of it, or whether we're just attached to it, attached to these negative energies, and are using the idea of investigating into it, so that we cannot let it go and come back to the present moment. Many people are very attached to worry and fear especially.
So we have to have patience with these when they arise and at times just to learn and emphasize the practice of just noting and letting it go. Noting, seeing how it affects the body, seeing the true causes which we don't understand - that if we attach to this thought suffering is going to come in the present moment. Through compassion to ourselves, let it go at that moment. Then if it comes back three seconds later, again note it for what it is; worry and fear. The basic practice. Worry, fear. Seeing it manifest in the body. Seeing its painfulness, having compassion for ourselves, trying to let it go, coming back to the present moment.
Especially with some old students, there is a tendency a to use the Reflections to try to get rid of things. Often this is coming from a lack of confidence in oneself, because "I don't want it to arise in the future, because I don't want to be able to deal with that again." So we have to try to remember that there are different parts of the practice, letting go of thought and developing Right View, skillful Reflection. If we've seen patterns in ourselves, and we understand certain techniques, then we have to have the patience to use these techniques when we're doing Reflection meditation, and allow the causes to seep into us.
We have to have patience when we're doing the objective awareness. Just moment to moment awareness, see things arise as part of our past Kamma, have patience with them, note them, let them go after we've seen the painfulness of attachment to them. And have patience even if it's very often that they come up, to have patience with them and just try to note them again. Because you have been feeding them a long time, the ripples will come back to you. We have to have patience with these ripples, until there will be less attachment to the worry and the fear.
A parallel practice is to reflect on the usual things that help us to let go of fear and worry, like Reflection on Death, understanding its universality, trying to have more compassion for ourselves, for others. Then gradually as we start to develop these, perhaps fear and worry, etc. may not arise so often, especially if we're becoming more objective with the hindrances when they come up. But if you are terribly attached to worry and fear and are using the idea of investigation as an excuse to hang onto it, then you may not be able to ever let it go. So objective awareness is very important.
And how do we get to objective awareness? We have to use the mental noting to help us step back and recognize it as worry and fear. We have to learn to have patience with its arising. Often we don't want it to arise because it's painful. That's what we want to see, it's painful! If you attach to worry and fear and grab it and look at it this way and that way and that way, it's still painful. That's the true condition of it. If you're not wishing to accept that, then you going to suffer. So try to see whether you are using the idea of investigation in order to justify attachment to your hindrances.
At the same time we need to strengthen the Reflections that help us to let go of worry and fear. But not to use reflections as a way just to get rid of negative mind states, "Oh, I'm going to shoot this down, I don't like feeling it, it's unpleasant." We want to see that it's unpleasant. That helps us to let it go. Then Compassion can arise for ourselves. So it would be important for you, especially when your doing the walking meditation, to see whether you are having patience with your hindrances, being able to note them objectively.
Strengthen the mental noting practice if you're having trouble with being objective with the hindrances and see whether that helps. Understand that you need to have patience, and that if you have been sowing the seeds, there's going to be a lot of ripples coming back, a lot of ripples. If you have been terribly attached to worry and fear those ripples will keep coming back, and you're just to have patience to note it again and again. Feel the suffering, try to have Compassion for yourself, and then come back to the present moment, feeling the feet on the ground.
Gradually if we strengthen these two sides of the practice you may find that you'll be able to recognize worry and fear more when they arise. With other difficult emotions like aversion, we have to strengthen the Compassion and Lovingkindness side of the practice. But also we have to learn how to be objective with aversion when it arises, to see it for what it is, note it, try to be aware of the suffering and try to let it go. If we strengthen this objective awareness and the mental noting then there will be less attachment to it when it arises, then it's much easier, when the mind is a little bit calmer and not so attached to it, to see other causes for it to arise.
So try to be patient with the hindrances, strengthen the mental noting, as it helps with objective awareness. See whether you really do like to be attached to these negative emotions. A lot of times we get attached to it because it gives us something to do. We get bored, and so it gives us a sense of identity, when often, all we need to do is just let it go and come back to the present moment.