Ok, there seems to be 3 questions here. Can there be a beneficial type of getting attention which is different then just craving for fame? Yes. Rosemary and I are getting attention, being the teachers we get the attention, we get the fame. We don't crave the fame. We try very hard not to get attached to the eight worldly dhammas, and fortunately we had this teaching before we started our own personal teaching. So, we are always on our guard, being aware of the attachment to fame. Now because we do get a lot of fame and attention, it's good because that brings people here. Some of you were the type of people where somebody told you about us. That is what brought you here. So as we become more famous it is a benefit for many other people who might not ever meet the Dhamma, might not ever get a chance to do a retreat such as this. If they get told of our fame then it might bring them here and then they benefit. So, as much as personally sometimes Rosemary and me would just like to go for a walk and not want the fame, the truth of the matter is that the more famous we get, the more benefit it will do for lots of people and our ability to spread the Dhamma.
Second part of the question, how important is it that others get our attention as well as praise? It depends. But any parent and any teacher, who understands how to treat their children or their students, needs the ability to give praise at appropriate times, to give attention to each of those students at appropriate times, and I say "appropriate times." If a kid is being naughty or bad in the classroom, they are going to get the attention, right, they are going to get taken out of the classroom or whatever. That is not really what a teacher would like to do with that student. A wise teacher would like to somehow teach that student the wish to achieve their fame in a better way. So a teacher may try to work with that student in a different way but not forgetting the other students, because if everyone else gets neglected then they are going to want attention maybe in a unpleasant way. So, with a teacher or a parent with children it is important to give those children or students some attention and some praise from time to time. However the praise has to be worthwhile, you can't just praise them when they haven't done anything good. That, of course, is part of the responsibility again of the teacher and parent, to teach the child what is good. Give the appropriate praise very quickly to help mold the child into wanting that type of praise.
Now, how to deal with people who want a lot of attention and sometimes give one the feeling of guilt if one is not always giving it? Ok, if you have people who are putting too much pressure onto you, we are back to what I said a few days ago when I said "draw the line." Explain to them you can't do it, that they are putting demands onto you that are simply unrealistic and it is only creating friction rather than helping the relationship. Sometimes you have to be honest about your limitations or their excessive demands. However, before you just assume it's their demands that are causing the problem and resulting in you feeling guilty, you may also want to look at what you are doing and consider whether you are actually giving them enough attention? Is the relationship really going smoothly, with both of you sharing in giving each other attention? Because one of the problems in many relationships is that one person starts taking their partner for granted and they forget to give them the attention, the extra bit of time, the extra caring.
And if the other person expresses their frustration due to your lack of generosity wanting your attention, then you have to really look at what you are doing. Maybe the feeling of guilt is actually part of Moral Shame and you need to change what you are doing, be more compassionate and generous and really give more attention. So that is something else to look at here.