What is very helpful in order to ground yourself in the present moment is to actually run through the body. When we are sitting in meditation, we start at the feet and run our awareness through the legs up through the body, through the hands, this helps to ground our awareness in the present moment. This type of awareness then will help when we start to observe our breathing. So it is very helpful to become aware of your posture sitting, and take your attention through the body, to become aware of your posture when you are sitting. Then take a couple of deep breaths, and watch the breath as it is.
Many people are trying to relax, rather than letting the process happen by itself. You may be tense in the beginning, but that is what we want to see, that is the reality of the moment. OK, if the body is tense, just keep trying to watch the breath as it is. If it is tense, OK. Just one breath at a time. Just watch it, is it short, is it long, is it rough, is it smooth? This is what the Buddha explained in the scriptures. We sit down and we try to watch the breath, a long breath is a long breath, a short breath is a short breath, if it is rough it is rough, if it is smooth it is smooth. We are trying to open to the reality of what is. As you do this you may start to see that the breath and the body and the mind are interrelated. Trying too hard to relax all this force in the mind will actually prevent you from relaxing, but opening to whatever is present, learning how to soften the mind, and if there is tension just trying to observe the tension, helps you to start to see how the mind, the breath, and the body are interrelated.
This helps you to be much more aware of the law of cause and effect. If you start to see that there is anxiety, note this, "worry," "fear," and look at the body. You start to see that if you have worry and fear in the mind, there is usually tension in the body. Very interesting. Then you start to see that this is suffering. What is the cause of suffering, your attachments and continuing to feed worry and fear. So we are not trying to force a relaxation, but rather open to the reality of what is. However, going through the body is very helpful for building this body awareness, this will then help us observe the breath whatever it is, long or short, rough or smooth. Just one breath at a time. Sometimes one is not relaxed because one is trying to achieve something. So become aware of if we are trying to get something, then note "desire, desire" and then just come back to one breath at a time. Reminding ourselves that we only have to try and be aware of one breath at a time.