There're times when you've got to force your mind into it. So don't worry if at times you think, "Oh, I don't want to force it, how can I coax it and baby it and bribe it." You can try that occasionally, but sometimes you have to use strong effort to direct you mind. It helps to make a decision at the beginning of the sit what you're going to meditate on.
For example, let's say you're going to meditate on death for the whole period. So you bring your mind onto death as much as you can. When your mind wanders off, note it, make the effort to bring it back. The mind wanders off again, note it, and make the effort to bring it back. If you're trying to coax it back, you may not be using right effort - in this case the effort to let go. So there's no coaxing it back, your job is to let go of the distracting thoughts and bring it back. In that sense there's a kind of force, but it's not what we usually call force, it's just our job, we're supposed to come back. There's no need to coax it back, you decided before your sit, "I'm going to do death reflection" so you stick to it as the main subject and when your mind wanders, keep bringing it back to the death reflection.
You have to remind yourself what determination is all about, one of the 10 Paramis. Determination means you're determined, you have to develop that determination. It's normal for the mind to wander off, your job is to bring it back, your job is to come back. And don't try to coax it back, as if you feel one has to baby Mara to get Mara back, no, no. Remember the other day I was talking about Mara and that Mara is an enemy and can be all sorts of things. Often trying to coax Mara is just more of Mara's game. It's not the wisdom game; it's more of the Mara game. So when your job is to come back, then as soon as you become aware, you do it, come back.
Now think of things in normal life. We're building a house, we've got a nail, we've got a hammer, what happens if your mind goes off your project? What happens if you forget to hammer in the nail? You're going to hit the hammer on your thumb. Anyone who's building a house knows that the minute the mind is wandering, they've got to get it back or they're going to create a problem, they could have an accident. Now if you're threading a needle, try to do it while you're thinking of something totally different. Really get your mind onto something else and kind of pretend you're threading the needle, now the odds are it'll never go through. You've got to let go of your other thoughts and you've got to bring your thoughts right to the needle and the thread, concentrate and be very mindful at the same time, to get it through. In normal life people know how to do this. So it's nothing different in the meditation practice. Your mind goes off, your job is to bring it back.