Right. One of the worst things that I ever saw a meditation teacher do was at the end of a retreat, the teacher said to all the students - I don't remember the exact words, it was something like, "now you owe me" and the teacher wanted the students from then on, when they went home, to meditate for two hours a day, an hour in the morning and an hour in the evening. There was this great big goal, great big ideal stuck on the students. How many of you guys have one hour in the morning and one hour in the evening that you can meditate? Can you raise your hand? I doubt it, that is a lot of time for an average person in normal society with a job and family - it is almost impossible and this teacher put it on to these students, "this is what you have to do". Now we have worked with a lot of these students, we have had to throw that out, we have had to drop that, because that was far too idealistic. It was way too much a goal that then ended up producing self hatred, producing doubt, producing all sorts of negative things in those meditators.
Now, oddly enough, we do want you to set goals, as to how often and how long you meditate, but what we recommend is every single day at least once, after you wake up in the morning, or before you go to sleep, or twice, but at least every single day for a minimum of five minutes. How many of you have five minutes to spare every day, raise your hand? Any of you? All of you, ah, isn't that nice. All of you can spare five minutes every day. You brush your teeth probably every day, maybe two or three times, you comb your hair, some of you may not, but most of you comb your hair every day. You probably wash your face and your body every day or whatever, you do so much for your body every day and you don't even question it.
I often ask, "What do you brush your teeth for?" And they say, "To keep them clean." I say, "What do you want to clean them for?" And they say, "well, well, so that I don't get cavities." I say, "What do you worry about cavities for?" And by now they don't want to talk to me any more. And I say, "Well, what do you worry about cavities for?" And they go, "Well, then I have to get it filled or something." And I say, "Yes, well, not only do you have to get it filled, but sometimes you might have to get new ones. Because if a tooth get too bad, you need a one. But you know what, you can get a whole set of new ones. (Steve pulls out his false tooth) You actually don't need your own set of teeth." Interesting?
You brush your teeth every day thinking they are so important, but you can actually get new ones. Now, tell me, how many of you can get a brand new mind and heart? This tooth was only $100, what's $100? Can you buy a new heart and mind for $100? No. You can't. So many people are so worried about their teeth, time to worry about your mind and heart. Can you brush it every day? Now, a little trick that helps many people is to take one of your old toothbrushes and put it next to your sitting mat at home. The reminder is right there, all the time. Your mind and heart are more important than your teeth.
Okay, set your goal. And when we say five minutes every day, that's pretty easy. Yet it is amazing how many people can't do it. It is amazing how many old students I have said this to can't do it. Yet five minutes really is not so hard. There was one old student after about five years had trouble keeping their practice going. I asked them whether they could do the five minutes and they said yes. I asked them whether they could promise to do it for the next year before they do another retreat. They said they would promise. After five years of not being able to have a regular practice in their life, they came back the next year, their mouth was so big with smiles, it was incredible. They had done it! They had meditated five minutes every day, they never did more than five, they stuck to the minimum. Now, that is ok, I would push a little sometimes, but they were content. They did it and they were happy and thrilled. And for the next few years they did more than that, they increased it.
Now, that is important, set a goal, make it regular, every day. The regularity is more important than the time, this is something very interesting. Some people really think five minutes is too little. Well, it is little. But when you make it regular, what happens for a lot of people is "Oh, this morning I have 20 minutes spare. Fine, so do 20 minutes. Next day you might only have five again. So do it. The day after you might have 30 minutes, the day after that only five minutes. You are allowing yourself to go longer when you have time and you are not forcing it, that is not the goal. That is a bonus. If you do it regularly every day, you end up liking it.