Question

I would tease a retreatant with the intention to help him to grow. Is it bad Kamma for me, and Dukkha for him? For example, when we queue up for breakfast I would take the food very slowly (I didn't do it yet).

Answer

That is not a good intention. We have enough Dukkha to deal with without heaping more on people, right, when it is not necessary? Yes, we have enough Dukkha. We don't need anybody to tease others. I think it is bad Kamma, so I wouldn't want you to do it. This is often a recipe for justifying our bad qualities, 'Oh, I will give the opportunity for the other person to grow'. So we wouldn't want to get into the idea of causing problems for others so they have the opportunity to grow because it is just the recipe for someone to become an abusive person. I have had to work with some people who are the victims of abuse and this is one of the arguments that the abuser gives, they would often use Buddhist philosophy, "it is your problem, you have to look at your reactions." But we don't want to make things difficult for other people, if we really have compassion and lovingkindness for them. Although this is an interesting sort of light question, it goes into a much deeper contemplation on justifying our negative qualities or trying to make things difficult for other people, when Samsara is difficult enough.

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